Showing posts with label Charlie Sheen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Charlie Sheen. Show all posts
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
The Charlie Sheen is Winning Infographic
Unless you’ve been living at the bottom of a well (or with a broken internet modem) for the past week, you’re aware that Charlie Sheen has completely dominated every news outlet the country has to offer. This “Charlie Sheen is Winning” Infographic should sum up all of the important stuff:
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
The Top Charlie Sheen Quotes
There has been so much genius floating around from the mouth of Charlie Sheen, the modern man’s folk hero, that we decided “Hmm, why isn’t there somewhere we can see all the awesome Charlie Sheen quotes in one place?” Now, we have it. Updated regularly (feel free to add yours in the comments, with the source preferably) this is your Charlie Sheen Quote Repository.
1. You can’t process me with a normal brain. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
2. I have defeated this earthworm with my words – imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists. - Sheen to TMZ in an open letter
3. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
4. I’m extremely old-fashioned, I’m a nobleman, I’m chivalrous. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
5. These resentments, they are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my sabre. - Sheen to TMZ’s Mike Walters
6. I’m tired of pretending I’m not special. I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars.
- Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
7. I’m here to collect. They’re going to lose. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
8. When I step between the lines it’s on, I’m there to show others how it’s done, it’s not really rocket science you know. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
9. She’s not there now and we are and I don’t know, winning, anyone? Rhymes with winning? Anyone? Yeah, that would be us. - Sheen to Alex Jones on The Alex Jones Show
10. I’m here and I’m ready. They’re not. Bring it. - Sheen to Dan Patrick on The Dan Patrick Show
11. Everybody else is going to be begging me for their job back. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
12. I earn two million an episode. I’m underpaid! - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
13. Well, I don’t have much of a reputation left to ruin. - Sheen to Howard Stern on The Howard Stern Show
14. I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available, because if you try it once, you will die and your children will weep over your exploded body. Too much? - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
15. AA was written for normal people. People that don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
16. To quote the great Allen Iverson, practice. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
17. My number one rule is that you don’t put anything on film. - Sheen to Howard Stern on The Howard Stern Show
18. I’m 45 years old, and I’m not interested in people treating me like a 12-year-old. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
19. If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
20. Wow. What does that mean? I’m bi-WINNING! - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
21. I probably took more [drugs] than anyone could survive. I was banging seven-gram rocks, because that’s how I roll. I have one speed, I have one gear: GO. [...] I’m different. I have a different brain, I have a different heart… I got tiger blood, man. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
22. No. Not going to, period the end. I blinked and I cured my brain. Can’t is the cancer of happen. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
23. The run I was on made Sinatra, Jagger, Richards, look like droopy-eyed, armless children. [...] I expose people to magic. I expose them to something they’re never going to see in their otherwise boring lives. And I gave that to them. I may forget about them tomorrow, but they’ll live with that memory for the rest of their lives, and that’s a gift, man. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
24. Don’t remember. Don’t care. Drug test don’t lie. Scoreboard doesn’t lie. - Sheen to Jeff Rossen on NBC’s Today Show
25. You’ve read about the goddesses, come on. They’re an international sensation. These are my girlfriends. These are the women that I love that have completed the three parts of my heart. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
26. Maybe the three of us will get married. I don’t know. I’m gonna say this. It’s a polygamy story. All my guy friends are gonna like throw tomatoes at me. It’s like an organic union of the hearts. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
27. We have a few rules here. Nobody panics. There’s no judgment. You park your judgment at the door. Nobody dies. And — enjoy every moment. What did I miss? Drink chocolate milk. We just have fun. There’s a ton of laughter in this house. A ton of love in this house. There’s a ton of nobility in this house. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
28. Stay off the crack. Drink a chocolate milk. - Sheen in a motivational speech to the UCLA baseball team
29. They’ll wake up one day and realize how cool dad is. And, you know, signs all the checks on the front, not the back. And you know, we need him and we need his wisdom and his bitchin’-ness! - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
30. Women are not meant to be hit. They’re to be hugged and caressed. - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
31. It’s been a tsunami of media and I’ve been riding it on a mercury surfboard. - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
32. I used to [take cocaine]. I’ve gotta be careful because that’s like lawsuits and things that went on. Well, yeah. I’m not taking it. I had to pay for it. Well, um, I hadn’t done any for a while, like seven hours, but I had this hernia thing that was popping out. - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
33. I won’t take [pain pills], so I maybe hit the vodka a little too hard to reduce the pain. - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
34. And then it was like, you must let me impose my will on your face. And it was like, woah dude! - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
35. That was an old brain, I have a new brain. I have a 10,000-year-old brain and the boogers of a 7-year-old. That’s how I describe myself. - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
36. I don’t know. I was on crack. Where’s Dr. Drew when you need him? - Sheen to Piers Morgan on CNN’s Piers Morgan Tonight
37. Come Wednesday morning, they’re gonna name it “Charlie Brothers,” not Warner Brothers, DUH. - Sheen to Andrea Canning on ABC’s 20/20
Monday, February 28, 2011
Entertainment- Video : Charlie Sheen: Not Bi-Polar, But ‘Bi-Winning’
Charlie Sheen continued spitting Fort Knox gold on both "Good Morning America" and the "Today Show" this morning. Here's a sample from his conversation with ABC's Andrea Canning:
"I don't know, man. I was banging seven gram rocks and finishing them, because that's how I go."
"You should have read the directions before you showed up to the party"
"The Nike slogan doesn't say, 'Just Try It.'"
"What's not to love? Especially when you see how I party. The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jager, Richards, all of them look like droopy-eyed children."
Friday, February 25, 2011
So… ‘Two and a Half Men’ Was Canceled and Charlie Sheen Lost His Sh*t on the Radio Yesterday
My God. When I woke up and started scanning the gossip-news-cluster-fuck on Thursday morning, I thought the only new Charlie Sheen-related item of the day would be some marijuana model girlfriend. Boy, was I wrong about this crazy fucking awesome bastard. His on-air radio interview with Alex Jones is probably the most tremendous Sheenism... of all time? I mean, just look at these pull quote gems:
"I think it was Nails (Lenny Dykstra, FTW!) that said, and I was really flattered that he got it right, he might be Nails, but I'm bayonets. I'm battle tested bayonets... I'm so tired of pretending like my life isn't just perfect and just winning every second, and I'm not just perfect and bi**hing and just delivering the goods at every frickin' turn. Look what I'm dealing with, man. I'm dealing with fools and trolls. I'm dealing with soft targets, and it's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee … they lay down with their ugly wives and their ugly children and just look at their loser lives and then they look at me and say, 'I can't process it.' Well, no, and you never will! Stop trying! Just sit back and enjoy the show."Followed by:
"I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time — and this includes naps — I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground."Followed by:
"I have cleansed myself, I closed my eyes in a nanosecond and cured myself of this ridiculous model of a disease of addiction and obsession. [AA] is just the work of sissies. The only thing I'm addicted to right now is winning. Ya know, this bootleg cult arrogantly referred to as 'Alcoholics Anonymous' supports a 5% success rate. My success rate is 100%, do the math! Another one of their stupid mottoes is, 'don't be special, be one of us.' NEWSFLASH: I AM special. And I will never be one of you."
He then proceeded to call Thomas Jefferson a pussy, but added:
"I cured it with my brain, with my mind. I cured it, I'm done … you don't look like you're having a lot of fun. I'm gonna hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here but I sure like the view, Alex!"Charlie spitting nothing but pure blue diamonds. Other items discussed: "Major League 3," "pure, complete gnarlisms," Vatican assassins deployed by the Pope, watching "Jaws" on a yacht, and all sorts of "winning." Oh yeah... "Two and a Half Men" production was brought to a halt. Listen to the whole 18 minute interview after the jump.
Upon hearing that "Two and a Half Men" stopped production again, Sheen picked up a quill and penned this rant to the producers, according to TMZ:
What does this say about Haim Levine [Chuck Lorre] after he tried to use his words to judge and attempt to degrade me. I gracefully ignored this folly for 177 shows ... I fire back once and this contaminated little maggot can't handle my power and can't handle the truth. I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words -- imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists. I urge all my beautiful and loyal fans who embraced this show for almost a decade to walk with me side-by-side as we march up the steps of justice to right this unconscionable wrong.Remember these are my people ... not yours...we will continue on together -- Charlie Sheen
Well. there you have it. Beyond epic. What's your favorite quote in the whole she-bang?
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